Weekly Nailgasm: Ombre Tribal

Hey boos!

It’s been a while since my last nail art post, so I wanted to kick off my Weekly Nailgasm series again! What better way to sashay back to nail art glory than with this chic ombre tribal print?

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Better GIT IT. I love ombre so much, whether it’s on hair, fabric, or nails. Speak not to me of trends! I don’t know whether ombre is still “in” or not, and I don’t care. I adore it and I intend to wear a disrespectful 34-inch ombre Mongolian weave to my 70th birthday paree. You’re all invited.

Ok! So for ombre nails I like to select three complementary colours. It’s super easy- I just paint each third of the nail a different colour, working fast so none of the colours dry before the next one goes on. This makes it easier to muddle the colours a bit at the transition line.

I always start with a good base coat- my fave is Sally Hansen’s Double Duty. For this design I used the following three colours:

“Beach Bum Blu” by Essie
“How do You Lilac It?” by Rimmel
“Shorts Story” by OPI

Once the base was dry, I used a black nail art pen to create thick graphic lines. All you need for this step is a steady hand and your imagination (wine helps, too). I let the lines dry and then I added some highlights with a white nail art pen and “Golden Nuggets” glitter by Essie.

Let the whole shebang dry and then finish with a good quality top coat- my favourite is Seche Vite Dry Fast Top Coat. And there you have it!

I loved this design so much that it inspired me to create this cute painting. That’s right. I’m my own muse, bish. YAAAASS for matching your nail art to your wall art!

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Hope you liked it, dolls! Look out for more Weekly Nailgasms coming soon. Hugsies.

Love,
Adjpants

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On Beauty.

My loves. This is the post that I started to write over a year ago and continuously lost my nerve. Today I read about Auntie Oprah’s epic faux pas and I thought, “the time is now.” In Oprah’s O Magazine, there was a fashion segment about crop tops. The line was “If (and only if) you have a flat stomach, feel free to wear a crop top.” This foolishment finally gave me the courage to share this post. Today we’re going to be talking about positive body image. It’s something that I’m passionate about, and something that’s very close to my heart.

It’s about to get REAL in here so I’ll give you a chance to settle in and get comfortable *sips tea* And we’re back. Like an alarming number of young girls, I grew up thinking that I was ugly. There, I said it. I was a shy and anxious kid, always hiding behind a book so people wouldn’t look at me. As a teenager I felt like if I wasn’t going to be attractive, then I should at least be funny. I used humour as a defense mechanism, constantly trying to please others because I was worried that I just wasn’t good enough.

I hid my body in clothes so shapeless that even Miranda circa Sex and the City Season 1 would be like “NO BISH.” At one point I was wearing baggy Dad Jeans from the supermarket, with my brother’s hand-me-down t-shirts #FixItJesus. I felt like my body was offensive to others. And then one day I met someone who changed my life. She was an ultra- glamorous girl I met at university, who noticed me trying to blend into the background, and slowly brought me out of my shell. One day I tagged along while she went shopping, prepared to sit outside the dressing room while she tried things on. But she hung up an armful of clothes and pushed me into the cubicle. I tried to protest but she gave me a sassy little dress to try on.

When I walked out to show her, nothing could have prepared me for her reaction. She was screaming “yaaaaassss” and told me I looked beautiful. I said that people would stare, that they would mock for me pouring my round body into such a form-fitting dress. She just laughed. “If they’re going to stare, why not really give them something to look at?” Why the eff not indeed? In the face of her matter-of-fact certainty, I actually bought the dress.

It was like somebody had flicked a switch, and in the light everything looked different. It was a whole new way of thinking. Was my body soft and fleshy? Yes. Did that mean I had to be ashamed of it? NO. The seed had been planted.

A few years later, I stumbled across an Instagram hashtag called #HonorMyCurves and I was hooked. Thousands of pictures featuring beautiful women, of all shapes and sizes. What they all had in common was confidence. These women were wearing all the latest fashions. Hotpants, bikinis, body con dresses. The next thing I noticed was the positivity of the comments- everyone was so supportive! And it only got better from there- I soon realised that there was a whole community of women celebrating each other through the  #bodyacceptance #goldenconfidence and #EffYourBeautyStandards movements.

Now, we all know that some people are sour and miserable and cruel, so there is always that one knob-jockey who tries to slide into the comments with “you’re all disgusting/you should lose weight/you’re putting your health at risk/you will die” Let this be a quick reminder to the haters that YOU CANNOT MAKE JUDGMENTS ON PEOPLE’S HEALTH BY LOOKING AT THEIR BODIES. Yes, there are some risk factors associated with being overweight, but there are also many slim people who are at risk of chronic diseases. May I invite you to have a tall glass of shut the hell up? It is nobody’s responsibility to police another person’s body. Stay in your lane.

I love my body. I don’t want it to look any different. The reason I try to exercise and eat clean is because it makes me feel strong and amazing. I need that strength to kick body-shamers in the face.

On vacation in the Dominican Republic recently, I was trotting around in bikinis and hotpants. Fresh out of f*cks to give, I was serving a disrespectful amount of backside and largesse of thigh. And guess what? I felt amazing. This from the girl who used to go to the pool in baggy shorts and an oversized t-shirt!

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None of this would have been possible a few years ago.

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image I love you guys and I want nice things for you, so I’m adding a list of my favourite body positive Instagrammers. Trust me- you need these women in your life.

1. @HonorCurves: We love her because she is a ray of sunshine and positivity, a true inspiration.

2. @GabiFresh: We love her because she is an incredible fashionista who changed the game when she coined the term “fatkini” and showed plus size women everywhere that swimwear belongs to us, too.

3. @essiegolden: We love her because she is gorgeous and so supportive of her followers.

4. @NadiaAlboulhosn: We love her because she is fun, FIERCE and wonderful, and her style game is ice-cold.

I once read something where a woman said, “I want to wear a figure-hugging dress, but first I need a figure worth hugging.” Honey I’m here to tell you that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. Your body is worth all the love and hugs in the world. Because God gave it to you.

And He never makes mistakes.

image Love,
Adjpants

p.s. Eat it, Oprah.

OOTD: Springtime Fine

Oh hey pumpkins! So spring has finally sprung in London and I am beyond thrilled. The sun is out, temperatures are rising and everywhere is green and lush. But my favourite thing about springtime? Flowers. I love flowers, and the entire city is in bloom.

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So when I stepped out for Sunday brunch recently, I was serving flower power realness. Get involved…

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I love this outfit. It’s casual but feminine, with just the right amount of YAAAASSS. The statement piece of course is this floral jacké (when a jacket is really fancy it becomes a jacké). I picked this up 2 summers ago at Primark and I’m pretty sure it cost me £12. With a piece like this, I like to keep everything else simple. I went for my favourite black sleeveless tee (£5), also from Primark circa 2013.

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Now let’s get into these jeans real quick! As a curvy girl, I find buying jeans to be a tricky process. I have a lot of “bawdy” and a backside that won’t quit. My bum is like, “AND I AM TELLING YOU… I’M NOT GOING.” And that’s fine- I love my figure and I keep an eye out for things that flatter it. These jeans are the Petite Sculpt & Lift Skinny from Marks & Spencer, and they were £35. Oh yes- M&S of the sensible court shoes and diaphanous undies. But if you wade through all that stuff you can actually dig out some gems! Also no shade to M&S because they’re really starting to fix up. I rolled these jeans up ‘cos I’m teeny, and I like the uber-casual feel this adds.

Shall we talk accessories? My cross-body bag and cut-out sandals are both from Primark. Can’t remember exact prices but they were so cheap, they practically paid ME to take ’em. The 50s-style tortoiseshell sunglasses I got from River Island years ago. Instant chic for just £10.

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And that’s it! A fresh, affordable spring outfit. I refuse to spend a lot of money on designer clothes (I need that cash for lipstick and travel). Whenever someone compliments me on what I’m wearing, I take great pleasure in telling them how little I spent on it. Why should I be embarrassed?

I’m my mother’s daughter, and she taught me to hunt down a bargain. She also taught me this: The dress doesn’t make the woman, the woman makes the dress. *Snap and a twirl*

Love,
Adjpants

Weekly Nailgasm: All That Glitters

My darling dolls, my sweethearts, my raisons d’etre! How have you been? I just wanted to share my new nails with you, because I love you and want you to have nice things.

I recently told you guys about my fave nail salon, Chapel Spa Nail and Beauty in Angel, North London. Well this week they slayed yet again…

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I saw this gorgeous design on my friend’s nails and RAN to the salon (we all go to Chapel Nails dahling) to request the exact same thing. I love it love it love it! Perfect glossy pale pink, with that opulent golden glitter on a feature nail. These nails are subtle enough for the office, but fierce enough for the dancefloor.

imageCute, non? Want to know how to recreate this look at home? Treat yo’self!

1. You’ll need a good base coat, a pale pink polish, loose gold glitter (you can get this on Ebay for next to nothing) and an uber-glossy topcoat. I recommend Seche Vite Fast Dry Top Coat.

2. Apply your base coat and allow to dry.

3. Apply one coat of your pale pink polish and allow to dry. Psst! With these sheer/pale polishes you really do need to let that first coat dry properly, or you’ll get a streaky finish and you will be sad. Ok? Ok.

4. Apply your second coat of pale pink polish, but leave your feature nails until last. The polish needs to still be wet, so the glitter has something to stick to.

5. Feature nail time! Carefully shake a tiny bit of glitter onto a piece of paper, and then use a fingertip to pick up a small amount. Take it slow or you’ll get glitter everywhere- it’ll be like the dressing room on RuPaul’s Drag Race! Now G-E-N-T-L-Y start to pat the glitter onto your nail in your chosen pattern. The key is to *just* touch the wet surface of the nail, very very lightly. The glitter will stick straight to it!

6. Dip a cotton bud into some nail polish remover and clean up any excess glitter on your cuticles.

7. Allow to dry and finish off with a slick of top coat.

8. WERK hunty!

Love,
Adjpants

p.s. Sorry about my dry skin in the first pic- this winter ain’t loyal! All the shea butter in the world can’t fight this struggle xo

Winter Warmers: Ice Bar London

Darlings. I don’t know what to tell you. It appears that I’m obsessed with winter and all winter-related activities. I blame the fact that I grew up in the tropics! Even after all these years, there’s still an element of novelty. Of course, I also blame Disney’s Frozen. I know I wasn’t the only one screaming out “YAAAAASS” during Princess Elsa’s fierce, icy transformation…

So after months of belting out “HERE I STAAAAAND… AND HERE I STAY” at every opportunity, you can imagine my excitement at hearing about Ice Bar London. I checked out the spiel on their website: “a cold sensory experience where the walls, bar, tables and even your own personal glass are made from crystal clear Torne River ice which is harvested from the pristine winter wonderland of Jukkasjarvi in Northern Sweden.” Well, spank my tush and call me Sally! Just the other day I was saying how I needed more Jukkasjarvi in my life.

So without further delay, my gal pal Miss Fufu and I trotted down to see what all the fuss was about.

Upon arrival, a nice young man in a sharp suit checked our tickets and whisked us into an orderly queue. Another nice young man handed us a cocktail menu (your first cocktail is included in the entry price YAY). When we got to the head of the queue, yet another nice young man expertly threw a fur-lined cape over our clothes.

So guys, this is when I lost all my behaviour and home training. Those capes are EVERYTHING! I felt like Ivana Trump boarding a private jet, dahling. We sashayed into the Ice Bar, and I was enchanted.

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It was absolutely stunning. Like being inside a glacier, with absolutely everything carved out of ice. The lighting was gorgeous too- pulsating blues, purples and greens. We immediately headed over to the ice truck that serves as the bar, and hopped into the front to survey the area.

There were small tables to lean on, corner booths… all made of ice. We were particularly taken by our cocktail glasses!

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I loved that the fierce cape came with gloves attached. No frostbite. There were also some incredible ice sculptures, including a giant cupcake. I was dying to lick it, but I knew Miss Fufu would leave me stuck there. There was also a huge hollow pineapple that you could stand in. Good clean fun.

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#HeyBooHEY

So your ticket gets you a 40 minute session in the Ice Bar. You sip your cocktail, enjoy the funky music, and then either head over to the in-house restaurant or step out to continue your evening! The vibe in there was nice and buzzy but not too overcrowded. What I loved most was the pure, childlike joy you saw in all the faces. Even the investment bankers (I saw you guys).

I think this would be a great little pre-dinner activity with friends, or even a unique icebreaker (you see what I did there) on a first date. Just think of the snuggling opportunities!

So bottoms up, sweethearts! Do you wanna build a snowman? Or nah?

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Love,
Adjpants

When:
Monday to Thursday 3.30pm – 10.15pm, Friday 2.45pm – 11.45pm, Saturday 11.45am – 12.30am, Sunday 2pm – 10.15pm. Exclusive champagne sessions available Friday and Saturday 7.15pm.

Where: 31-33 Heddon Street, London, W1B 4BN. Nearest Tubes: Oxford Circus or Piccadilly Circus

How much: Standard Tickets £13 – £16, depending on day of the week. Upgraded Tickets £17 – £20. Champagne session Tickets £24 (treat yo’self).

Weekly Nailgasm: Christmas Edition!

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My sweethearts, it’s Christmas Eve and I couldn’t be more excited! You all know I LIVE for glitz, glam and all-round eleganza, and Christmas is the perfect time to get really stuck in.

Before I get knee-deep in turkey and champagne, I wanted to quickly share my festive nail combo with you guys. I decided to treat myself and go get my nails did at my fave salon. My North London gals- get on down to Chapel Spa Nail and Beauty in Angel, STAT! Ask for my homegirl Cindy, she’s the bestest and I adore her.

One layer of OPI “Big Apple Red” was used, with OPI Liquid Sand in “Impossible” on top. I love this Liquid Sand polish- it’s a pink/red glitter with tiny silver dots and stars.

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Tres cute, right?

Have a wonderful festive season my darlings! Eat EVERYTHING, laugh, love, kiss boys (or girls), take care, and be fierce! God bless x

Loads of Love,
Adjpants